it’s been a long, long time since i wrote an entry to my journal. just wasn’t interested to write anymore. may be. wat took me to writing again? nothin. just bored. haha… boredomness, as you know, could make you do things… just anything, to make time pass by so easily.

just quick update about my life & wat happened these past months while I was hibernating…not much. as i don’t see my life very interesting. hehe… still working in a call center. yep. working. working. and working. w/c sucks by the way.

i was expecting someone to arrive this month but unfortunately, that person’s an asshole. hehe… at least, finally, he’s been honest that he’s indeed a big, fat liar. it’s a paradox. by him deciding to forget me, and ending all his lies, he’s being honest. for the first time, he has. sad that for two years, i believed in him. boyz… boyz… boyz… really are liars. anyway… end of discussion. like i care. of course i care! damnit!

oh well… aside from that, nothing special happened. same old boring life. haven’t gone on a gimmick anymore. and i hate it every time i pass by LOFT. some disco/restro bar. masyadong sosyal mga tao. i don’t like their kind of music. reminds of pasosyal na sinungaling na bwst na lalaking un. anyway. un lng.

hv to go back to work now. got til 10am. and off i go. ohhh been reading books by the way. w’c is very unusual of me.

inside a cramped net cafe… browsing thru the web… i’m among these strangers, who i bet got nothing to do with their lives. sadly, i’m one of them. well, i’ve got work later @ 2am. can you believe it, this is my first ever off from work that i went outside my "jail" (our apartment). like all these people around me, i’m in front of old PCs. trying to enjoy whatever we see online.

i’m starting to get soooo boring… duh! i’ve always been boring all my life. thanks to friendster, i got someone to tell this to.

ugghhh!!! sakit ako ulo. must be my headband. i’m tired of my life.

= = = = = =

i’m actually thinking about… hmmm… nothing. nothing serious. feb14. hahaha… they’re you go. something to talk about. something to write about.

what’s in it for me? unfortunately, nothing. i’ll be on leave on that day. but definitely, not because i’ve got a date. that’s totally impossible. bogus! although… hahay… masyadong obvious na pagsa-sour-graping ko.

i dunno. i just hate to think about it but here i am. i’m actually thinking about it. argghhh@!

i’m having a headache. this time, i know it isn’t the headband.

i met. i talked to him. we chatted. became friends. ended up as "lovers." ours lasted for more than i thought it will. i liked him. i loved him. i still do. but when can you say if enough is enough? and when is too much too much?

i never thought i could be as dumb as this. for me, it should have been an easy thing to take care of. it should have been an non-brainer. i shouldn’t really waste my brain cells thinking what needs to be done.

i’m getting tired of hoping, wishing someday, somehow, he’ll learn to love me, trust me, and treat me as someone who’s for real.

how can i give my heart to someone who doesn’t really give a damn about me? but i already did. i gave him my heart. and right now, i don’t know if it’s something i should regret about. i love him however you define love is.

but i can’t blame him. it might have been, afterall, all my fault. it wasn’t his fault to staying with me. he made it clear to me that he can’t promise me anything. but here i am. i stayed. i hated him a lot. i loved him all the same.

but until when can i hold on to something "invisible?" til when can i hope for something impossible? til when can i love someone who doesn’t love me enough to think i’m worth at least 60 seconds of his time.

which reminds me… it was my birthday then. i used to think that day was a very special day. that’s my birthday afterall. that somehow exempted me from being a "spoiled brat." which means i can wish for whatever i want and have it. i asked him to call me. it was something he has never done before although we’ve been "together" for more than a year now. never done, and obviously will never do. he said "yes" because i forced him to say so. i waited for him to call me on my birthday even i knew that he would not call me. i hoped for some miracle to happen. i waited some more. but he never did.

how can i believe in him when i’m not even worth his time? how can i stay when i know he can’t stay with me? how can i keep on loving someone when i don’t even know his address because he’s afraid i’m some freak who’s gonna bomb his place? how can i keep on holding on when he hasn’t promised me anything?

i wish this is just another heartbreak that i can laugh about after a recovery. hehe. just another heartbreak den.

now here’s i guess a possible answer to that "big,big" question. whew! actually, i’m just looking for something at least a little bit for real, say to rationalize my being <gee> single. guys, i’m counting days, weeks, months…umm..years.yet, i haven’t met that someone still.i dunno.i don’t think there’s something wrong with me…<or so i thought>but seriously,i think, at least, i could be a "good" gf. nyahahhaa…selling my self short.nah…nevermind.i fine.better single than sorry…<oiiii…sweet lemoning>

Prechell, you’re single because you don’t want to settle

You, more than others, have a fairy tale fantasy of how things should
be. Ever since you were a kid, you’ve probably dreamed of the perfect
wedding, coming home to a white picket fence, dog, and 2.2 kids (how
does that work, anyway?). When someone asks what you’re looking for,
you don’t skip a beat: You’re likely to have a handy checklist that
details your perfect partner. Hair and eye color, height, religion,
education, career, interests, the list goes on.

While it’s great to have standards — Hey, you shouldn’t have to settle,
after all — there’s one slight glitch in your master plan: No one has
made the grade in real life — at least not yet. Next time you’re out
with someone, keep yourself from mentally checking that list, and give
love — and others — a chance. That special someone who you’ve written
off may be perfect for you after all…

… i took time to really dig for this personality test from tickle.com…effort dbah…

WHAT KIND OF GIRLFRIEND AM I? (based on hypothetical data…ouch! pano nmn kc ung questions were supposed to be answered by those nga naa na bayu…ng-imagine na lng ko what to answer…hahaha…)

Prechell, you’re a Steady Supporter

Stand by your man — that’s just something you naturally do. Once you’ve
committed to a relationship, you are a constant companion who enjoys
the comfort and stability that comes from being a couple. Not quick to
judge, accuse, or think the worst, you have a lot of trust (in him and
in yourself), and you rarely worry about where he is or who he’s with.

For you, mutual respect is of utmost importance. You are comfortable
and confident in your own skin, making you a great pillar of strength
in all your relationships. Whether he’s striving to climb a mountain or
land a promotion, you have his back. Best part is, you know he’s got
yours too.

I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken — and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.

=====> charot! mao ning akong gi-ingon nga another crap… ambot oi… samok! kapoi explain. anyway, the show must go on. life doesn’t stop until your dead anyway. hehehe… mao ra to. bow

I’ve read this article being posted from a blogsite [WordPress]. Let me just provide you some of the details about this one.

The Science Is Clear: Marriage Should Be Eradicated

Why People Marry
“To signify a long-term commitment to each-other.” (according to an Australian research)

“marriage signifies commitment.” (based on a study made in Canada)

Commitment is a subjective term; and marriage is often defined a commitment to love and fidelity, to predefined moral values, to family, to tradition, and to enhancing power, wealth, and status.

Why Marriage Should Be Eradicated
People marry, studies tell us, because they want to honor and fulfill various ideas about long-term commitment. But science shows that the vast majority of people are unable to fulfill almost any of the commitments that compelled them to marry in the first place.

——- This study may not be directly relevant to us here in the Philippines, but may be it does [somehow]. Things change. And peoples’ perception of commitment and marriage has changed as well.

Personally, I believe in marriage. And i intend to only get married once (this is not America). It’s not really about what people might say, or what the Vatican says about it. Malayo ang Roma from here.

Ambot. define love daw. hehehe… korni! Nonsense oi! Ingon bitaw ko. FYI lang ba. ——–

I hope at least some of you have seen Roswell already. The story revolves around the lives of half-alien-half-humans Max, Michael, and Isabel… while I wanted you to all know what the story is all about, I jz don’t feel like narrating it now. But anyway, here are some of the nicest thoughts I got from it. Jz try to read through…

Maria: I thought you’re leaving…

Michael: I am… I just wanted… I dunno…

Maria: To say goodbye?

Michael: I wanted to say that this whole thing has been screwed up from the beginning. You and me. Us. Just the whole long, stupid story.

Maria: Thanks.

Michael: But I wouldn’t trade it for anything. It’s meant so much to me. From day one, from the moment that I kidnapped you and stole your car, I knew you were the girl for me. I never wanted anyone else.

Maria: Michael…

Michael: I still don’t. Just… Whenever I’m going, whatever I’m doig. Just know I’ll always love you.

Maria: Wait. No, wait, you just can’t say that and then…

(Michael leaving)

- - - - -

(Jesse’s van approaching)

Jesse: I’m going with you…

Isabel: No. Jesse you can’t.

Jesse: To hell with Boston… and to hell with a career and a normal life… whatever that is. I love you. That’s all that matters to me.

- - - - -

Liz: I would do anything if it means being with you.

(Max & Liz staring at each other… Max holding a coal/carbon)

Max: A trick I learned from Superman. Let’s see if it really works.

(Max turning carbon into a diamond… giving it to Liz)

Liz: Oh, my…

Max: Liz, they’re taking our home from us. They wanna kill us… and they might. But when I look in your eyes… I don’t feel angry, or deprived. I feel like the luckiest half-human in the planet. You’re pure. You’re - you’re true, and you’re real. And right now that seems like the only thing that’s right. I wanna be with you, Liz. Forever.

Liz: "Forever" may only be 12 days.

Max: Then, we’ll take those 12 days. And we’ll live 12 lifetimes. Liz Parker… will you marry me?

Liz: Yes.

- - - - -

(During their graduation)

Max: Hi, I’m Max Evans. I thought I’d take this opportunity to… to say a few things on behalf of myself… and the graduating class.

(lights off)

      Hey, some of us are here tonight to walk across this stage… and get our hard-earned diplomas and toss our caps in the air. But there’s another group here tonight… a group of people who are here for another reason altogether. They’re here to say goodbye. Goodbye to their high school lives.

(Isabel leaving her seat, saying farewell to Jesse and her parents)

: You see, this group has been through a lot. And tonight is the night. They’ve decided to call it quits. It’s been a long, hard road for them. They have a lot of wounds. They’ve lost people. People that were close to them. They’ve had each other to cling to. But tonight… that’s coming to an end.

(FBI’s Special Unit on guard)

: I’m a member of that group of outsiders. I always knew I was different. And for a long… long time, all I wanted was to be another face in the crowd. But in the end, it wasn’t possible. I guess it never was. So from now on, I’ll just… concentrate on being who I really am. Some of you might not like that. Some of you might even find that frightening. But that’s not my problem anymore. I have to be who I really am. I have to be who I really am… and let fate take care of the rest.

: So thank you Roswell. Thank you for letting me live among you. Thank you for giving me a family. Thank you for giving me a home.

"What is there in Love without trust?" said Cupid to Psyche. I’d say there is none.

[kung walang trust sa counter, mag-frenzy ka na lang.]

                                                         - - - -

Being charged of lying before you’ve got the chance to defend yourself is a fallacy. Just remembered my Philosophy class when I was in college. Hehehe… What the hell was that called again?

An ad hominem fallacy consists of asserting that someone’s argument is wrong and/or he is wrong to argue at all purely
because of something discreditable/not-authoritative about the person
or those persons cited by him rather than addressing the soundness of
the argument itself. The implication is that the person’s argument
and/or ability to argue correctly lacks authority. Merely insulting
another person in the middle of otherwise rational discourse does not
necessarily constitute an ad hominem fallacy. It must be clear that the
purpose of the characterization is to discredit the person offering the
argument, and, specifically, to invite others to discount his
arguments. In the past, the term ad hominem was sometimes used
more literally, to describe an argument that was based on an
individual, or to describe any personal attack. However, this is not
how the meaning of the term is typically introduced in modern logic and
rhetoric textbooks, and logicians and rhetoricians are in agreement
that this use is incorrect.

As to my Philippine Constitution class, I can’t forget our lesson on "the one’s right against self-incrimination."

No person shall be … compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself

The Fifth Amendment protects witnesses from being forced to
incriminate themselves, and applies wherever and whenever an individual
is compelled to testify. To "plead the Fifth" or to "take the Fifth" is
to refuse to answer a question because the response could form
incriminating evidence.

                                                           - - - - -

Hehehe… wala lang… tripping lang on discussing something a bit more complicated ideas other than talking about lots of nonsense.

I rest my case.

                                                           - - - - -

How would one be able to combine Mythology with something as "technical" as discussing about logic or moreso, Philippine Constitution?

Hehehe… pag la ka lingaw, ana jud na. Talent. Hehehe…

                                                           - - - - -

I heard this drama over the radio. "Jologs" kaau. Hehehe… I guess naa topak ang babae.

Note: The names of the character have been edited for the purpose of avoiding copyright infringement. Hehehehe…

Genebib: This is not wat i want, but this is the only thing i know that’s ryt…

Lando: Lagi ka naman tama e… whew…
Lando: Pero alam mo expected ko na na ganito e

Genebib: hmm… ain’t being self righteous Lando

LandO: pinapatagal mo pa… cge lang…

Genebib: hahay… if that’s what u think i’m up to, ikaw bahala
Genebib: ni minsan, i nv lied to u

Lando: sana nga… nakakasama lang sa loob

Genebib: cge, tnx for at least talking to me

                                                          - - - - -

Drama… drama… drama… if you like to read more about the "tragic" lovestory of Genebib and Lando, feel free to contact the author for subscription. Abangan ang susunod na kabanata… Toinks!

                                                          - - - - -

Hahay… I jz wanna rest. Give myself a break. Go somewhere. Duka beach perhaps. Stay there for at least a couple of days. Sleep a lot. Eat a lot [oink oink]… such an impossible life.

                                                          - - - - -

Cheers! <bowing to audience>

Here I go again… my ever bagutbot talent chuvanis. Waaaaaaaaaa……… (playin on my audio now is VINDICATED by Dashboard Confessional.)

Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of which has caught my eye

And roped me in
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing
I am captivated

[Chorus]
I am Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I’m right
I swear I knew it all along

—>>>>> nothin’ really… i just feel down [...again...]

—->>>>>>>but i’m fine i guess…hmmmm…

—–>>>>>>>>>just a bit confused. myt be kinda overanalyzing myself or the situation or that….

——->>>>>>>>>>i shudn’t hurry myself from fall…errr…yah know…ing in love (?!)

It’s funny how a man only thinks about the…
You got a real big heart, but I’m looking at your…
You got real big brains, but I’m looking at your…
Girl, there ain’t no pain in me looking at your…

                                                                    — WiLL.i.am (PUssYcat DoLLs’ BeEp)

I had this e-mail from Ate Joanna…and well, i find it very much interesting… and very much true especially the last 3 lines listed in here. Guys are such assholes. All they want to do is go under your skirts and then, _ _ _ k! That’s the only thing they’re good at anyway.

It’s not
difficult to make a woman happy.   A man only needs to be:
  1. a friend
   
    2. a companion
   
    3. a lover
   
    4. a brother
   
    5. a father
   
    6. a master
   
    7. a chef
   
    8. an electrician
   
    9. a carpenter
   
    10. a plumber
   
    11. a mechanic
   
    12. a decorator
   
    13. a stylist
   
    14. a sexologist
   
    15. a gynecologist
   
    16. a psychologist
   
    17. a pest exterminator
   
    18. a psychiatrist
   
    19. a healer
   
    20. a good listener
   
    21. an organizer
   
    22. a good father
   
    23. very clean
   
    24. sympathetic
   
    25. athletic
   
    26. warm
   
    27. attentive
   
    28. gallant
   
    29. intelligent
   
    30. funny
   
    31. creative
   
    32. tender
   
    33. strong
   
    34. understanding
   
    35. tolerant
   
    36. prudent
   
    37. ambitious
   
    38. capable
   
    39. courageous
   
    40. determined
   
    41. true
   
    42. dependable
   
    43. passionate
   
    44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING
TO:

   
    45. give her compliments regularly
   
    46. love shopping
   
    47. be honest
   
    48. be very rich
   
    49. not stress her out
   
    50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME
TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

   
  51. give her lots of attention, but expect little      
   
              yourself
   
  52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
   
  53. give her lots of space, never worrying about
   
             where she goes

IT IS VERY
IMPORTANT:

   
    54. Never to forget:
   
          * birthdays
   
          * anniversaries
   
          * arrangements she makes

   
      HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

   
    1. Show up naked
   
    2. Bring food